Restless

Do you ever wake up in the middle of the night and just can't seem to go back to sleep? (Your mind is overwhelmed with so many thoughts that you just can't seem to relax) Kimball woke up around three with a dry cough. i gave him some medicine and sang him back to sleep. just before that I was having all sorts of weird dreams. So when I got into bed I thought about my dreams then one thought led to another, then another. Finally I got out of bed. Tried playing the piano for a while....still not sleepy. Then I tried reading my e-mails, and that is what led me to here. I thought about cleaning or organizing our files, but I was too afraid of waking my family. Hmmm....my next option is I guess I could read.

I really feel bad for those people who have sleep apnea and go through this every night.

Being Aware

So yesterday evening we had a visit by the missionaries. They sat down to show us a video on YouTube aboutthe government working toward a one world government. After visiting with them and watching the video Dave and I decided to e-mail it to some friends and family. Several of you who visited my blog probably got the e-mail. I want to start off by saying that I really don't know if everything about it is true. I do however, feel that there was at least some truth to it.

There are many today who would like to pretend that everything is hunky dory in our country. There are many people of the church who believe this as well. This I find interesting especially since it is revelation that our constitution and country will hang by a thread at the time of the second coming. So I myself take that as though we need to be prepared for anything and everything.

I don't consider myself a conspiracy theorist but I am leary about many things going on in our country today. So I think that part of watching for the signs of the times is being up to date on everything on both sides of the spectrum. I am just saying be aware of things don't be too quick to shut them down until you have thought, pondered and prayed. After all, the most important relationship we can have during these hard times is with our Heavenly Father, our Savior Jesus Christ, and our families. Oh, and a side note; Don't dwell on it, just be aware so you know what to watch for.

My Eyes Have Been Opened!

I know I have been really bad at this blogging thing and have been fired many times (good thing it is not a job), but I really feel like things have been crazy. Loved my holidays with the family. Being with Dave's family was the best. It was great having everyone in town. I must share some things that have opened my eyes lately.

I have always considered myself a pretty nice person. I remembered when I first married Dave that I absolutely worshiped the ground he walked on. As the years went by I started pointing out things that he was not doing for me. It did not help being around a bunch of women who did the same. I started griping and whining about things that I was not getting from him that I thought I should get. Getting more frustrated by not seeing results with "nagging him" if you will, I started becoming an angry wife. The more I tried to change him the more I would get frustrated.

So this Christmas holiday I was having a lovely conversation about husbands with my dear sister-in-law. You know who you are and I hope you don't mind me sharing. She smiled as she listened to me and then she told me that she and her spouse were having the same problem. Then one day she realized that she made everything his fault, that she was not fessing up to her problems. She decided she really needed to look at herself and change herself. After all we are the only person we can change. Thank you very much. I realized that I needed to do the same.

So weeks went by and it seemed so hard. But then last week my sister let me borrow a book, don't laugh, "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands." My sister said at first it may make me mad but if I think about it, what she says it true.

Surprisingly I was not mad or irritated. So many of the stories I read I could relate to. Instead I found myself crying realizing just how selfish I have become. I realized how angry I made myself over things that I wanted Dave to do for me that I myself was not doing for him.

One of the stories she told I would like to share, cause I feel it is not only to do with marriage but life in general. A grandfather was talking to his grandson. "Grandson," he said, "there are two wolves living in my heart and they are at war with each other. One is vicious and cruel, the other is wise and kind."
"Grandfather," said the alarmed grandson, "which one will win?"
"The one I feed," said the grandfather.

It may sound corny to you but it made me realize how often I allow myself to get angry about things. The more I talk about how stupid a driver who cuts me off, the more angry I get the next time I am out on the road. The more angry I get about anything in life and dwell on it the more angry I am in life. The more I give out of love, the more happy I am. the more I try to find the positive in a person, the less anger, annoyance, or resentment I feel towards that person.

It is much easier to look for what is wrong with the world and the people in it. It is much harder to look inside yourself and see whats wrong with you and figure how you can fix it. I am not saying that you can not get frustrated by things in life. I am just saying don't dwell on it. Look at what you yourself can change and you will be much happier. It has only been a week and I already am.

I have really tried hard to work on things that I can change in mine and Dave's relationship. I must say that even in just this week things have improved on his end as well. I gave and I received and we are both much happier. There are many quotes I loved in the book that I liked, but can't share them all. Ladies I think it is a must read if you are married. If not i is still good insight to the way women tend to treat men and the way they get treated in return. Hope I did not bore you all, but I wanted to share.